Updated 9th September 2024
Supporting the women in your life through menopause
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Perimenopause and menopause can be a challenging transition for women in their 40s and 50s. Although this phase marks significant physical, emotional, and psychological changes for over half the world’s population, it remains under-researched and often misunderstood.
As a result, many women find themselves unprepared for this experience, while those around them are even less equipped to provide support.
With the right knowledge and understanding, you can make a meaningful difference in how the women in your life — whether a partner, friend, or family member — navigate this journey.
We also include some tips aimed at people who might work with or manage women during this life stage.
Educate yourself
The most important step in supporting someone through perimenopause or menopause is getting informed (hopefully, this article will be a good start).
Here are five facts about this transition to know:
Perimenopause is when women have symptoms of menopause, but their periods have not stopped.
These symptoms, which can range from hot flashes to mood swings, can be experienced for up to 10 years before menopause.
Fluctuations in sex hormones — including estrogen and progesterone — are the primary drivers of symptoms.
Perimenopause ends, and menopause begins when a woman has not had a period for 12 consecutive months.
Menopause usually occurs between the ages of 45 and 55 but can happen earlier or later.
While there are at least 35 reported menopause symptoms, it’s important to note that every woman experiences menopause differently. In our research, which included data from around 70,000 women, 99.8% reported at least one menopause symptom. And 66% of perimenopausal women reported at least 12 different symptoms.
By educating yourself about these changes, you can offer more empathetic and informed support.
Share ZOE’s MenoScale calculator
To support women going through perimenopause and menopause, ZOE developed the MenoScale calculator. This free calculator provides a score for women to understand the frequency and impact of their symptoms.
With this score (out of 100), women can:
Start conversations. Use their score to have meaningful, data-informed discussions.
Make tweaks. Learn how lifestyle changes might affect their symptoms.
Track progress. Re-use the calculator to see how their score changes.
Check out the calculator here.
Listen to them
Being truly listened to is one of the most validating experiences a person can have. For women going through menopause, feeling heard and understood can make all the difference.
Create a safe and non-judgmental space where she feels comfortable discussing her experiences.
Ask how she’s feeling, and most importantly, listen without rushing to offer solutions — unless she asks for them. Often, what she needs most is emotional support.
Be patient and understanding
Mood swings and irritability are among the most common symptoms of menopause, even for women who are usually upbeat and easygoing. These mood fluctuations are often out of their control, so it’s important not to take them personally.
Instead, practise patience and empathy. Recognize that this is a challenging time, and your understanding can provide some much-needed comfort.
Minimise stress
Stress can intensify the challenges of menopause, making an already difficult time even more overwhelming. Whether you’re a partner, friend, or employer, you can help by reducing the stressors in her life.
At home, this might mean taking on more household responsibilities or encouraging relaxation.
At work, consider offering flexible hours, the option to work from home, or simply creating a quiet space for breaks. Remember, these adjustments can make a significant difference to her overall well-being.
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Encourage healthy lifestyle changes
Our research indicates that lifestyle changes — like improved diet and regular exercise — can help manage menopause symptoms. As a partner or friend, suggest activities that promote health and wellness, such as going for walks together, preparing nutritious meals, or trying a new fitness class.
If you’re an employer, consider implementing wellness programs that focus on nutrition, exercise, and mental health.
Providing access to resources like counselling or wellness workshops may also be useful during this time.
Be reassuring
Many women suffer a hit to their self-esteem during menopause, often due to physical changes such as weight gain or thinning hair. It’s important to be mindful of this and offer reassurance and affirmation.
Avoid making comments about her appearance that could be interpreted as negative.
In a work environment, ensure that any discussions about appearance, dress code, or health are handled with sensitivity and respect. Recognise that some women might feel more self-conscious during this time and adjust your approach accordingly.
Support her medical needs
While lifestyle changes can be beneficial, some women experience menopause symptoms severe enough to require medical intervention. Encourage her to seek medical advice if needed and support her in following any treatment plans recommended by her healthcare provider.
As an employer, ensure that your healthcare benefits include coverage for menopause-related treatments and foster a work culture where women feel comfortable taking the time they need for medical appointments.
Maintain intimacy
Menopause can affect libido and emotional closeness, but this doesn’t have to mean the end of physical and emotional intimacy. If you’re a partner, have open conversations about any changes in your relationship and be willing to adapt.
Physical intimacy can take many forms, from holding hands to cuddling, all of which help maintain a close connection.
As a friend, emotional intimacy is equally important; continue to share experiences, offer support, and engage in activities that strengthen your bond.
Summary
Menopause is a journey, not just for the women experiencing it but also for those who love, care for, and work with them. By educating yourself, communicating openly, and offering unwavering support, you can help make this transition much less challenging.
